Wednesday, December 29, 2010

The Goodness of God

The Goodness of God- By Randy Alcorn

Randy Alcorn offers something solid to hold onto in the midst of trial and tribulation. When the world brings you down or when you're suffering or sad or in pain He speaks truth into your life via his book The Goodness of God which is a condensed and more focused version of his other book, If God is Good. Randy offers many bold statements in his books and these are just a few:

"any faith that leaves us unprepared for suffering is a false faith that deserves to be abandoned." (pg.5)

"Worry is momentary atheism, crying out for correction by trust in a good and sovereign God." (pg.110)

Randy doesn't provide superficial words of hope and his book definitely isn't one of those feel good books. It is meant to get you out of the mind set of suffering and to realize God's truths and God's love and to provide you with that knowledge base so that the next time you are down or suffering you can easily hold onto God's promises.

This book is definitely a great one for all Christians to read and even those who want to explore and learn more about God.

I received this book for free for review from Waterbrook Multnomah.

Saturday, December 25, 2010

I'm not sure what to title this...

I used to think that I was a great actress. That by being in some various amounts of plays and musicals made me great, and that I could easily take on any role that ever came to me. And if I ever had to do something challenging or something that I personally didn't know if I could do, or maybe even something that I didn't want to do or seemed "out of character" for me, that I could just develop a brand new character and take on her role. I decided a long time ago that living as someone else was easier and more exciting. I decided to buy into many lies about myself and realized that I was too boring and too plain and not a valuable character in this story of life. I decided to create a new me with the different characteristics that I thought people might like. I was able to blend in with many different groups of people. Old people loved me, children adored me, and all that mattered was that I was well-liked. Well, I am a terrible actress. Looking back, all I know is how different emotions feel. Ergo, i'm a pretty emotional person.

I used to think that I was a great singer. When I was really young I would sing a lot of Disney songs. I used to pretend that I was Belle from Beauty and the Beast and I would re-create the scene where Belle and the Beast were dancing in the ballroom. One time my uncle found me singing and wanted to put me into voice lessons. He thought I could have been this great singer, but unfortunately (or maybe fortunately?) there was nothing for me in Pine City at the time. I have sung in a choir since I was in first grade. I would sing along to karaoke machines in bars and a bunch of drunk people would cheer me on. And somehow all of that and years of people telling me that I was good gave me a big ego. But, I am really not a great singer either. (I realized this when I had a hard time singing Silent Night at a Christmas Eve service at church.)

I used to think that I was a great person. I would go to church every sunday and be involved with as many things as I can. When I lived at home I would work part time, go to school full time, take care of my brothers and cook and clean and do my homework and still have time for some sort of a social life. I got involved with youth groups, bible studies, women's nights. I was a camp counselor, Jr. High youth leader. Now I'm on leadership with Campus Crusade for Christ and attend a college-women's bible study.

I came home from college a few days ago. And since then, a bunch of people from my church in Pine City have told me how proud they are of me and how great I am and all sorts of stuff. But, i'm really not that great of a person either. I lie A LOT and I curse like a sailor. I am not a very good friend. I don't read my Bible. I only pray when I need something. I contemplate giving up my faith altogether. I sometimes want to throw my life away. I want to give into many different temptations, but don't ever go through with it for fear of what people would think.

A friend asked me a few days ago a very simple question. "What makes you happy?"

I wish I had a "favorite things" song to just list off all these things that makes me happy. But I don't. Nor could I have at that point made some crap up that makes me happy. My list was pretty short. I'm pretty sure I just told her that being with friends and singing and reading and listening to music makes me happy. And while all of that is true, I feel like there should be more. That I should have this joy all the bloody time. But I don't. The truth is, it takes a lot to make me happy right now.

The truth is. I'm incredibly messed up. Maybe it's because of the years of pretending I was someone that I was not that messed me up. Because now, I don't even know who I am or how to even act like me. I don't know how to adapt myself into the place that i've created for me when my old character fails. I don't know how I got to where I am today, and I don't know what to do.

To my very good friend who let me cry that night and who has lived with me and endured me this past semester no matter how crazy I was/am. Who tells me i'm beautiful and loved every day, even though I never believe her: I'm working on my "happy" list, and on myself.

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Radical

Radical- By David Platt Taking back your faith from the American Dream.

You and I can choose to continue with business as usual in the Christian life and in the church as a whole, enjoying success based on the standards defined by the culture around us. Or we can take an honest look at the Jesus of the Bible and dare to ask what the consequences might be if we really believed him and really obeyed him.

If Jesus is who he said he is, and if his promises are as rewarding as the Bible claims they are, then we may discover that satisfaction in our lives and success in the church are not found in what our culture deems most important, but in radical abandonment to Jesus.


-David Platt in his book called Radical.

This book challenges you to think about your life in a deeper way. So many people who call themselves Christians are not walking the way Jesus has called them to walk. (Myself included.) This book takes a look at the heart of the people who live their life radically for God. People who live below their means, sell everything they have to follow God, give and devote their entire lives to glorify His name. Jesus said to his followers to pick up their cross and to follow Him, but how many of us actually do that? This book will challenge you in how you think and may change your life.

I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review.

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Under the Overpass

Under the Overpass-by Mike Yankoski

I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review.

Have you ever put your faith to the test? Jesus calls us to live our lives radically for Him. He calls us to take up our cross and to follow Him, leaving everything behind you. Leaving the comfort of home, the comradeship of friends, money, possessions, everything. Do we have that kind of faith to willingly give up everything we have and seek Him out? Mike Yankoski was an upper-class college student who one day heard a pastor talk about living your life radically for God and having that kind of faith. He began to question himself and realized that he wanted to find out if he left everything behind him and lived on the streets if his faith would get him through it. Mike and Sam spent five months living on the streets of four different U.S cities where street life is prominent and rough: Denver, Portland, Washington D.C and Phoenix. They panhandled for money. Ate in dumpsters and slept outside on the ground.
This book will challenge your faith. It is not meant to guilt you in anyway into leaving everything behind you to live your life out on the street as Mike and Sam did. This book is meant to get you thinking about whether or not your faith in God is really at the level it should be at.
Mike and Sam's life post-street life was radically changed and to this day they speak at various seminars and rally's sharing what they had learned and inspire people daily with their story.
I think that this book is very good. It definitely has been challenging me to think about my own faith. I know that I could not live my life out on the streets and I know that my faith is not at the level it should be at. I definitely think this is a book that people should read, it is a very fast and easy read book. The stories Mike and Sam told throughout it were captivating.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Then Sings My Soul

Book review- Then Sings My Soul (Special Edition) by Robert J. Morgan

I recently received this book in the mail from Booksneeze.com, which is a book/blogger program where I can review books for free! (Pretty exciting, eh?) This book stood out on the list of books available to review on the page because this is a book about hymns. I thoroughly enjoy hymns! I grew up in a church were hymns were the only thing sung. In this book, each hymn gets a two page spread. The sheet music for each song gets a page and then on the following page there is a bible verse in reference to the hymn and also a short story on how and why the hymn came to be. There are a lot of very interesting stories in this book. For instance, no one knows who wrote "The First Noel" Handel composed "Hallelujah Chorus" (one of my favorite songs) in just twenty three days, and, "Be Thou My Vision" (another one of my favorites) is an Irish folk melody. There are also a lot of hymns that I have never heard of before mixed amongst familiar old tunes and favorites. The hymns are arranged in alphabetical order with a special section in the front for Christmas Songs. I would highly recommend this book to anyone who enjoys Hymns and would like to know the meaning and background and overall story of the hymns they love the most. Or to my friend who collects hymnals. :)
I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Monday, November 8, 2010

A Year with God

A Year with God by R.P Nettlehorst

I picked up this pretty hefty book and thought to myself that there was no way I was going to finish it in the near future. Though, I haven't finished it yet this is a devotional like no other. The layout of this book is very nice and simple and easy. The table of contents have topics for any emotion you are feeling and you can simply go to that section of the book and read the devotionals for that topic. The devotions themselves are nice. I really enjoy the fact that there is no specific date in which a certain devotion must be read in. That means you can start this book whenever and if you perhaps miss a day of reading you don't have to scramble to get back up to date. It's a go at your own pace sort of devotional. Each devotional is only a page long, it starts out with a Bible verse and then a short excerpt from the author. I would highly recommend this devotional for someone who is looking for a light devotional, or something to do in a hurry or perhaps someone who is new to the faith. The devotions seem to be quite easy and good for someone who perhaps have never gone through a devotional before and it also works for someone who has gone through many. I highly recommend A Year with God for anyone.

I review for BookSneeze

Friday, November 5, 2010

You should be proud!

I decided that blogspot does not have any good templates. So I went elsewhere for mine. And I edited it. I have yet to figure out how to get rid of some of the stuff on the left and right of the blog. But alas! One day i'll figure it out. Or i'll ask Alicia who makes her own templates...

Anyway! It's time for bed. A real update is coming soon!

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

I should have gone to culinary school...

I fear that I may have messed up my entire life.

I don't think I should be an El. Ed major.

Nor do I think I should be a CFS major.

I should have gone to culinary school and been a chef/baker or something like that.

Here is my reasoning:

I like to cook. I like to eat. I cook when i'm stressed. I cook when i'm not stressed. I enjoy cooking for other people. In fact, I love it. I have cooked all my life (basically).

Dang it!

Friday, September 24, 2010

It's fall

Well hello there...

It's fall time. Or as my cute little brother says "it's autumn Mindy, not fall!" He must have just learned that in school and now insists that autumn is the correct terminology.

It's been a long time since i've updated. The gist of what has happened is that camp of course has ended. The day after it ended I moved back to St. Cloud for school. I moved into my apartment, which is completely awesome by the way, and classes have started. I'm on week 5...well actually since it's technically friday, i'm ending week 5. Crazy! It doesn't feel like it has been that long, but I guess it has. I also got a job! I work at Aria Communications. I basically am a telemarketer but it's a little more different that what you'd expect. Basically, I call on behalf of different non-profit organizations and schools and make telephone calls for them asking for support for whatever they stand for. I just got trained into UMAA, which is the University of Minnesota Alumni Association. I get to call alumni and ask them to support the U. And if they do they can get a cool tshirt and a card which allows them to get discounts to a million different places like target and sears and barnes and nobles and basically anywhere you want to go. 0_0. I guess it's kinda cool. But yes, that is basically what I do. I had orientation both monday and wednesday and today (friday) is my final day of orientation and a test. I have to call 3 different supervisors and pretend they are alumni and try to get them to give support. Hopefully I pass it.

Anyway, having a job is making my schedule a little bit crazy right now. I will be working Mondays, Tuesdays, Fridays and every other weekend. But tuesday and wednesday I have Bible Study and thursdays I have CRU. So I literally have no open days anymore, except for the 2 weekends a month that I don't work. Hopefully this doesn't present any challenges for my homework...

Homework sucks by the way. I have really lame classes this semester. My HURL and Philosophy class drives me insane. They are so dumb and requires an intense amount of reading crap that I already basically know. Which doesn't make me feel very bad when and if I don't read it...

Well, I just wanted to give a quick update on my life. It's almost 1 am and I have class at 10. And I'm watching the food network (a new favorite tv show...) and I should really just sleep. :P

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Update!

Hello!

Last week at camp I counseled 10 6-8th grade girls. You can read about it on my other blog, onamissionwithgod@blogspot.com.

Yesterday I spent the day in St. Cloud going job hunting. Basically I walked around the mall and got applications to stores I wouldn't mind working at and shopped a little...

I went to church this morning and at the last minute was asked to sing on praise team. It was pretty exciting. And now...i'm mentally preparing myself to counsel yet again. This time for senior high week. Hopefully I make it through. :)

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

New Blog

I now have a blog dedicated to camp. If you wish to read it/follow here's the address: onamissionwithgod@blogspot.com

Monday, July 5, 2010

At Camp!

It's been super hard to update my blog while at camp! So my apologies!

Up until this week, I've only had one break a day and it was at 9 pm and a little bit pointless, as there's nothing to do at 9pm, except shower and sleep. Oh, and make rice in my rice cooker for days where all I consumed were cheese sandwiches. Good times, good times.

This week however, breaks for program staff have been incorporated. I get an hour break from 9-10 ( I get to skip morning chapel!) and from 3-4 pm (missing part of camper free time.) So that's good and exciting. I feel lots better today than I have been feeling. It's hard to go from 7am to 9pm. I slept during my first break today and did laundry, sit around, did dishes and got a slushie for my last break. It's currently 4:36 and i'm not on break but the computer I was working on quit working and no one is in the office and it looks like it's going to storm outside so i'm taking advantage of this blogging opportunity!

This week at camp we have 7-9th graders. They are crazy. Last year this was my week from Hell. Actually, I had a cabin from hell. And unfortunately for whoever their counselor now, they are all back and 4 out of the 5 hellish campers are in the same cabin. But they are being surprisingly nice to me...now. Last year a girl in the cabin next to ours took my campers shoes and threw them in the woods and also put a herd of goats in my cabin...that girl, is in the cabin with my campers from last year. Oh man. I can't even imagine the drama going on in that cabin right now.

Anyway, people are coming to the office. Maybe during tomorrows break i'll set up a new blog specifically for camp and blog about non-camp related things in this one so it doesn't become too camp-crazy! But for now, adios!

P.S. News Alert. Funnel clouds possibly in Hinckley? Dear God no. I do not wish to file into a bathroom and put two mattresses over my head, I really do not want to. :(

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

14 more hours.

In 14 more hours I am leaving Pine City for Camp! It will be the day that i've waited for, for a long time! The lovely day where summer officially begins for me. The day where the stress of home and school leave me momentarily. So...since tomorrow has to be so awesome, why am I kind of dreading it?

Don't get me wrong, i'm still excited to go to camp. It's going to be an awesome summer. God's going to do some amazing things. I'm going to grow more spiritually and learn a lot of things. But, I just feel as though i've got so much to do still before camp begins. I have school stuff to deal with and I have just stuff I want to do. But. It'll be okay.

This past weekend and yesterday were pretty amazing. I spent the weekend going to Grad parties and hanging out with some friends. Yesterday I went to St. Cloud to deal with some school crap and then hang out with Betsy and Nick who came along with me. We ate at Mongo's, browsed a few stores, hung out on campus for a bit and drove back to Betsy's home where we swam in her pool, played Wii and made and ate hobo dinners on the campfire and s'mores. It was awesome. We started talking about ghosts and seeing figures on sides of the road and stuff like that, and that's where I became creeped out and left shortly after that. But it was a good day! Here are some pictures from it:



Look at those gigantic utensils!

We found them at this cool decoration store next to Mongo's...which I forgot the name of it. But Nick coulnd't believe I have never been to one before. They sell imported decorations and dishes and furniture and stuff. It was pretty neat. I'll have to remember that for when I go apartment decoration shopping!








Hobo dinners!

I might not be able to blog much while at camp. I would like to make a blog specifically about camp stuff so that if people don't want to hear all the Jesus-y things I have to say they don't have to. I'll hopefully be able to update this one once in a while. :P

Saturday, June 5, 2010

Pre-Camp

Today I spent the majority of my time at Camp. Although i'll be going there officially in 4 days for the summer, I couldn't resist an opportunity to visit. Alicia and I went up to work on the computers there. I mostly worked on the camp website, with the help of Alicia of course. It was fun but also frustrating because folders and files were everywhere and there were still stuff on the website from 1998 and stuff. So I weeded out what I think is all the old stuff. The camp uses frontpage to manage the website. It is very disorganized. Stuff is everywhere. I'm not sure what everything is. There's random files that are named weird things. It's just crazy. It'd be so much better if the camp started a new website and everything was fresh.

Besides working on the computer, we got to hang out with Jack and Becky. It is always fun. We had dinner, reminisced about old times, talked about the upcoming summer and all the improvements the camp is making. One thing that really saddens me is that the board decided to get rid of the little red bridges we have, separating the girls from the boys side and a way to cross over the lovely moat we have at camp. I guess they will put some sort of other bridge in, but it won't be the same! Alicia and I were sad. So we had a photo shoot with the bridge. This is us looking sad. Because we were.



We also had a lovely time down by the beach at sunset and playing the bongo's in the chapel and sitting/spinning on the gigantic tire swing. It was a lovely day. :) I so cannot wait for camp!

Friday, June 4, 2010

Random Musings

It's 1:13 am and my mind is an ocean of thoughts right now. It has ranged from school to room color themes, decorations, imagining what my kitchen should look like next year and the like. I'm so bloody excited to live in my apartment next year. I feel like it's a big mistake though, it's a horrifically expensive place to live. But I get my own bathroom. I'm 100% sure my bathroom will be teal and brown. I'm not sure what i'm doing to my room yet, although i've already picked out some artwork i'd like to adorn my walls with. So i'd like to match that. The common colors in them all is blue/teal/pink. So teal and brown could very well be my bedroom scheme too. I just want my place to look awesome.

I have been doing a lot of thinking about next year too. What i'm going to do differently and how i'm going to change. I'm a planner. I like to plan everything, I like to stick to my plans. It bothers me immensely when people change their plans on me. Like, you have no idea how much it upsets me. I wish it wasn't like this though, I would like to be rather spontaneous. I enjoy doing some spontaneous things, but only to a certain degree. Anyway, looking at the Marry Me Young blog I came across this picture:



I was coming up with all the different combination's, which I mean, isn't much. At first I was like...well duh grades and social life. But then, I won't get much sleep. I like sleep. Hmm...Grades and sleep. Then I won't really have a social life, dammit, either way, I just can't win! I can't have them all! That sucks! Regardless of what I do, good grades have to be my number one priority next year. Even if that means not hanging out at Calvary on thursday nights past midnight or even GOING to calvary. Or other such things.

Another thing I was thinking about was camp. There's only 5 days left before I go. Again looking at Marry Me Young's blog I came across this photo:



Oh how beautiful. I want a drawer full of old letters and photographs and cool things like that. I'm going to become writer of letters this summer. It's going to be awesome. I suck at writing letters to people, but gol-darn it, i'm gunna fix that! Well. I need to get some sleep. That's about all the random musings from me for tonight.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

"Deer is dumb."

Yesterday was such an amazing day I feel the need to blog about it.

I woke up at 7 am, after sleeping for 3 hours to help clean the house. (This was not the exciting part.) My grandparents came at 10 am and brought with them my car! Oh beautiful car! I have missed you!

I got a lecture though, about how my car was dirty and smelled like camp when they got it. Because well...they got it shortly after camp, so yes, smelled like camp...and because I drove people in wet swimsuits up to their cabins because walking up a hill in the middle of the night in a forest is a very scary thing to do. And also, there was a lot of sand in my car because of that. And some people spilled pop in my back seat.

So I cleaned it up. My trunk smells like lake. Which is sick. So I still need to work on that, but the rest of my car just smells like chemicals. So at least it's not like lake, and the plus side is, I might get high while driving. Who knows.

My grandparents stayed for a long time. We hung out, my grandpa helped fix some things around our house and yard and my grandma took me to get some stuff. We grilled stuff for dinner, which wasn't really all that exciting because i'm a vegetarian but oh well. And we celebrated my brother James and Josh's birthdays.

Anyway, fast forward to like 8:30. I met with Brittany, i'm so so excited she lives in Pine City. We talked about her Stint project with Campus Crusades and what she'll be doing in East Asia for a year. And we talked about life. And we ate ice cream. It was glorious. Afterwards, it was like 10, so I went to Alicia's house and we hung out and drove around Pine trying to find something to do. Wound up driving to Cambridge just go to to Perkins. It was around midnight at this time and very dark outside. I was going really slow because it's scary and there might be animals. Well, there were animals. Lots of them. I was on highway 70 when a pair of floaty eyes drifted across the road in front of me. Freaked the hell out of me. It didn't register that it was an animal until I asked Alicia about it a few minutes later. (I think the chemicals I used for cleaning my car were starting to sink in.) A little while later, I was driving just past Braham when a deer was on the side of the road. I gasped. Slammed on my breaks. Even though it was on the SIDE of the road, like...it had already crossed. But who knows man, it could have changed its mind and bounded across the road again to the other side. After my gasp, I exclaimed "THAT'S A FRICKIN' DEER! DEER IS DUMB" in that exact wordage. Alicia and I laughed about my grammatical error in that statement. Pretty much all the way to Cambridge.

Perkins was lovely. My bacon was crispy. Life was good. We got the bill and then I realized I had left both of my cards at home. I emptied my purse and scoured through it feeling like an idiot. I had like $6 on me. It covered most of my meal. I owe Alicia some money...

Driving back home was an experience. I was starting to get tired because I only had like 3 hours of sleep. I drove really slow again. Saw like two more deer in which, i stopped again and honked at them. Because they were in the middle of the road, stupid, dumb deer. *sigh* It was pretty adventurous. I got home at 3 am and crashed. It was great!

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Randomlicious

It's almost 4 a.m and i'm starting to make a daily habit of staying up WAY too late each night. Today I told myself I was going to change this, but yet i'm still awake.

Betsy introduced me to this wonderful tool called google reader. And apparently I set one up a long time ago, but I must have forgotten about it. Well, never again google reader, never again. I love you. It handles all the blogs I read and follow and even some of those I don't read but look cool and will one day read. Anyway, the past few days i've been catching up on blogs. One of my favorites being: http://playpretend.tumblr.com/

Today was a fun day. I put insurance back on my car, because I'M GETTING IT TODAY! *Insert screams of joy here* I hung out with Betsy and ate some delicious chinese food while working on Nick Basta's graduation present which we actually presented to him today. Betsy and I made him a Ramen cookbook. Very collegiate, no? We called it Ramenlicious. After the website "ramenlicious.com" which was the host for all the recipes we copied into his hand-made cookbook. It features some delicious recipes like "ULTRA CHEESE RAMEN" (it literally consists of cheese whiz, shredded cheese and cheese sauce) and "RAMEN PUDDING." (Consisting of cooked ramen blended with milk and topped with chocolate chips. Mmm...) When I said delicious I really meant disgusting. But Nick is going to make them all anyway. Betsy and I took some pictures. Hung out outside. Showed me her pool, in which I put one leg in at a time. The water only comes up to my thigh. Waited forever for Nick to get off work. Gave him his present. Laughed about all the silly things we remember about our friendship and I went home early. 'Twas a good day.

In other news, i'm getting really bored of my music. I've been listening to Glee music for almost 2 hours now. I think i've gone through each and every song ever since episode 1. I need to stop this. I need to go to bed. I need to get up at 7 am. I need to get into the habit of waking up early for camp. I leave in 7 days!!

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Congrats!

Nick Basta graduates today! WOO!

I'm excited for the church service today. All the graduates are doing special music.

Let the season for grad parties begin, also meaning free food, fun and hanging out with some pretty cool people. :)

Also, edited to add, I made it into 7 of the senior's slideshows at church. I didn't realize that I had so many friends that were seniors. This is the youngest group of friends that I have.

Saturday, May 29, 2010

You and Me can write a Bad Romance ;)

I've finally caught myself up on some television shows that I have been missing out in. I don't normally watch T.V very much, but there are a few shows that I do like, like The Office, Biggest Loser, Greek and Doctor Who. But, I also have taken a fancy to Glee. Yup, i'm a Gleek. It's not so much of the drama/high schoolish entertainment that i'm really in it for, I really like the songs. Last weeks episode was a Lady Gaga feature and I was surprised and excited to find out that Idina Menzel was going to be in it! I love her! She played Elphaba in the original Broadway cast of Wicked. Also, they did "Bad Romance" and that song has been in my head for days. It was a pretty good episode man.

Oh, also, it totally looks like a lot of fun to dress up super crazy like how they did in Bad Romance, just sayin. Except for those shoes. Those shoes look like they kill, they fascinate me, but still. They look awful and painful.



Look at the first and third one. What the heck. How does that even work?! I can kind of understand the middle one--though that just looks painful too. Ouch!

Friday, May 28, 2010

YOU GET VASELINE!

Somebody likes Vaseline a little too much.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IKxBoPgujNk&feature=player_embedded#

I think Tyra Banks is a complete idiot. I cannot stand her shows. She has a very whiny voice, and all around seems very superficial. This clip made me laugh though, as she's jumping up and down, doing God knows what on the floor (seriously, what IS she doing?!)Screaming at the top of her lungs "YOU GET VASELINE AND YOU GET VASELINE AND YOU GET VASELINE!"

Vaseline isn't all that great, Tyra. I love how the tiny bottle has rhinestones on it. And how it is valued at $100. Who spends $100 on Vaseline, Tyra, who?! I could probably buy some at walmart for like $2 and then spend the other $98 on something better than Vaseline. If i really wanted to have a rhinestoned bottle of vaseline. I could spend the $2 at walmart for vaseline. $2 for a bag of rhinestones and I have a hot glue gun...I could make that happen. But that is just ridiculous! It's crazy how she/some people have that much money to blow. Why not pay for my college tuition hmm? I don't see Tyra gyrating on the floor about that. Or saving starving children in africa. Tyra, you suck!

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

I'm only gunna break your heart.

Much earlier today I was on my way home from St. Cloud. I had talked to my advisor, submitted necessary papers to the appeal office and stocked up on powdered sugar donuts and orange crush. (I didn't have breakfast this morning man!) It was time to go home. The sun was shining. The birds were chirping. The squirrels were roaming about campus. Two ducks crossed my path by Centennial Hall. It's summer man. There's nothing better than taking a long drive down a almost-country road. Though, I would prefer that the road was not highway 95. Because highway 95 sucks. There's usually always some annoying drivers and ridiculous trucks. And one thing about 95, it's almost impossible to pass those bastards. See, I have road rage, even when not on the road. Going 50 in a 55 annoys the hell out of me. If you're not going to speed then at least do the bloody speed limit people! Seriously, if I was driving, i'd be doing at least 65. But anyway, it felt amazing to sip orange pop and listen to secular pop music on the radio. Usually I deem pop music as trash. Except for when it isn't. And a lot of trashy music came on, and Emily and I laughed at the dumb lyrics and the fact that these singers are making millions of dollars for singing vowels. Seriously, Rihanna has two songs where that's basically all she's doing. In "Umbrella" the whole long spiel where she sings the letter a. Over and over again. Very catchy, but i'm betting most everyone can do that. And then again in one of her newer songs collaborated with T.I and based on the popular "Numa Numa" song (again it's just vowels) is, "Live your Life" where again, the chorus is made up of mostly singing the letter A. Anyone sounds good singing that. My mom sounds good singing that. And that's saying a lot here people!
Emily, Molly and I have "a song" which we crank up on the radio whenever it's playing, jam out and sing at the top of our lungs. That song came on the radio today, and what song is that you might ask? Um...it's "Break Your Heart" by Taio Cruz and Ludacris. *Blush* Yes, it is a godawful song. And yes, I really don't know the words other than the chorus. And yes, it has an awful message. But something about singing "i'm only gunna break break break break your heart!" in a really upbeat way, really loudly is kind of fun. Okay, a lot of fun. It's kinda funny that I even like that song, well, I mainly like the chorus, but it talks about guys breaking girls hearts. Meh. Not exactly cheerful, but the tune is pretty catchy. Listen for yourself: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U8gjZldgpXY

So yes, singing those songs really loudly, sipping orange pop, and driving on a long road on a hot summer day = amazing.

Too bad i'm now home. Gah. Total countdown until i'm gone again is 2 weeks! And hey! I get my car back in a week! Hallelujah. I miss my baby.

It's been Real.

Well, this will be my last post from the teal couch in Emily's apartment. Mostly because the teal couch is not Emily's, it's her roommates Megan's and Megan is moving out and taking it with her. Sad day. And also because I go home tomorrow/today. I'm kinda sad to go actually. I was having a good time in St. Cloud. It's nice when you don't have anything to worry about (except money. Money is the root of all evils.) I've hung out with some friends, gone to church, swimming, played games, watched movies and just did nothing for most of it. Well, as well as gone to a meeting and written up 3 appeal papers. I have a meeting with an advisor tomorrow at 10 am. And then Emily and I are hitting the road once again and going home. It's been real St. Cloud, it's been real. Hopefully the news I receive tomorrow and next week is good so I can be here again.

Monday, May 24, 2010

It's Hot.

I am writing to you dear blog from a teal couch in the living room of my friend Emily Johnson's apartment. I currently have 3 fans blowing on me and am scandalously clad in skimpy clothing. It's bloody hot here. What the crap. Both Emily and I don't even know what to do because we're so hot. So I decided to post a blog about how hot I am, which if you haven't guessed already, is really really hot.

I guess we are going swimming now. Heck yes. This blog is pointless. :P Sorry.

Friday, May 21, 2010

Almost half-way

Day 15 of being at home. Only 19 more days to go until I leave for Camp. The last 15 days have been stressful, not gunna lie. I've endured a lot of crap, put up with some ridiculous stuff and things just keep getting worse despite the whole "Giving it to God" kind of thing. Maybe i'm doing it all wrong. Or maybe this is just one of these times where God is challenging me. I seem to feel as though it might be the latter. I can totally picture God asking me, "if I take it all away, will you still follow me?" Because it's God. And He does that kind of thing. So...if that IS the question, what would my answer be? After doing some thinking and really looking at what I would do, I decided that yeah, I will still follow Him. He can take away everything, but He will still be there. Proving that He is really all I need in the end. And it's going to be okay. So God, if that was the realization you wanted me to get from all this, then I got it. Now could you please work on my current school issues?

Anyway, going back to home and stressfulness and just life in general. Being home made me realize many many things. I think the past school year I had gained a lot of independence, grown spiritually, my self-esteem was much better and I was a much happier person. I learned that I cannot live at home anymore. I learned that if you put me back into a situation where I feel oppressed and not independent, but feeling stuck instead, that everything that i've learned and felt in the past year at school will leave you more quicker than it took to get it. I feel like the past paragraph was not worded well, but I hope you get the point. I'm back to the beginning, where I was just a year ago. I'm not happy, my self-esteem sucks, I feel trapped and my spiritual life is suffering. I spend countless hours on facebook and online chatting to friends and playing games to get away from it all and to help ease the pain. It's summer, and that's pathetic. I had such high hopes for summer, and...it's not happening. Many friends have told me to just leave. I'm 22 years old, I don't need to listen to anybody. Easier said than done. Like I said, I feel trapped. I don't see a way out, even if you do. There's a lot of risk involved, and let's face it. Me and risk, we don't get along.

School has me currently frustrated/angry/upset/miserable. I am trying to figure everything out, and if I even will be going to school in the fall. Tomorrow, I'm going with my friend Emily back to St. Cloud to work some things out and hopefully just make everything okay again. I'm just really sick of everything that's going on, and asking people to pray for me, and I had a friend tell me that she's sick of having to pray for me. She didn't really mean it in a harsh way, she just meant that she wishes she could personally do something for me. But yeah, i'm sick of it. Have I mentioned there are 19 days before camp? Yeah. I cannot wait. I know that I NEED camp, even more than camp needs me. It's really amazing, I think I learn more there than anywhere else. I grow more there, and can be myself, and be happy. I have some friends who like to poke fun of Camp and how I seem to worship it. But if they only understood what it does and means to me, then maybe they could understand why I'm so excited and why I talk about it a lot. That being said, i'm looking forward to the rest of this summer and getting back on track with God and all that I had last year at school. 19 more days of hell. The rest of the summer will be bliss.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Instructions on how to be Gothic.

Inspired by a very recent conversation with Betsy (when I say very recent, I mean, i'm still having this conversation as I type) here is instructions on how to be Gothic, if you ever wondered how:

Potato little dove says:
Dude.
There's no way to "be" gothic unless you dress that way.
And listen to the Cure and pretend to be sardonic.
Just wear your choir dress.
That's pretty goth
Mindy says:
ROFL
no it's not
Potato little dove says:
Yeah it is.
I just said "Yaaahhhh" out loud in response to you
on accident
Mindy says:
ROFL
Potato little dove says:
THAT'S HOW STRONGLY I FEEL ABOUT THIS.
Mindy says:
i do that a lot
haha
how is it gothic?
Potato little dove says:
Dude
Mindy says:
just because its all black?
Potato little dove says:
NO.
Because it's like
VELVET
That's the most gothic fabric there is
and it's also nasty lacey shit
= gothic
You should get a pair of really high platform shoes
that are like
super nasty and chunky


Well, there you have it folks. In a nutshell, wear really high, chunky, nasty platform shoes, black velvet and nasty lacey shit, listen to Cure and pretend to be Sardonic and you might be Gothic.

If you're wondering how this conversation came to be, it's because my newest profile picture looks Gothic to some people. It really isn't.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Let the Waters Rise

Let the Waters Rise

Don't know where to begin
It's like my world's caving in
And I tried but i can't control my fear
Where do I go from here

Sometimes it's so hard to pray
You feel so far away
I am willing to go where You want me to
God I trust You

[Chorus]
There's a raging sea
Right in front of me
Wants to pull me in
Bring me to my knees
So let the waters rise
If you want them to
I will follow You
I will follow You
I will follow You

I will swim in the deep
Cuz You'll be next to me
You're in the eye of the storm and the calm of the sea
You're never out of reach

God You know where I've been
You were there with me then
You were faithful before
You'll be faithful again
I'm holding Your hand

[Chorus]

God Your love is enough
You will pull me through
I'm holding on to You

God your love is enough
I will follow You
I will follow You

[Chorus]

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Broken

Broken- Lindsey Haun

Wake up to a sunny day, not a cloud up in the sky
Then it starts to rain, my defenses hit the ground
And they shatter all around, so open and exposed
I found strength in the struggle
Face to face with my trouble

When you're broken in a million little pieces
And you're trying but you can't hold on anymore
Every tear falls down for a reason
Don't you stop believing in yourself
When you're broken

Little girl don't be so blue
I know what you're going through
Don't let it beat you up
Hitting walls and getting scars
Only makes you who you are
Only makes you who you are
No matter how much your heart is aching
There is beauty in the breaking
Yeah

When you're broken in a million little pieces
And you're trying but you can't hold on anymore
Every tear falls down for a reason
Don't you stop believing in yourself
When you're broken

Better days are gonna find you once again
Every piece will find its place

When you're broken, when you're broken

When you're broken in a million little pieces
And you're trying but you can't hold on anymore
Every tear falls down for a reason
Don't you stop believing in yourself
When you're broken
Oh, when you're broken
When you're broken
When you're broken

Sunday, April 4, 2010

A Fun Night. XD.

Today felt like last year, kind of. It was nice. :)

Home was alright, I basically just hung out at home and did whatever. After Betsy and Kayla got off work, Betsy, Kayla, Nick and I went to Betsy's house to play games and hang out. It is important to know that Kayla and I haven't hung out together in like a year or something like that because of some stuff. But we've been talking lately and things are okay. Anyway, we all started off playing the game of life. I learned it's important to get those stock cards. Because I didn't get any. And I was poor the entire game. Also, I guess it is kinda important to go to college. Oh well.

Next we played apples to apples. Which is hilariously fun each and every time we play it. Betsy and I kind of formed an alliance against Nick. I'm sad the "Magical" "Baked Potato" and "Hellen Keller" cards didn't show up though.

Nick had a 1 am curfew, so we took him home and Kayla left. Betsy and I continued to hang out. We drove around town a bit. Contemplated going to Denny's which would have been a 20 minute drive to North Branch and we decided we should save money and not go. So we drove to "New Jersey" which is this part of Pine City that Betsy thinks looks like New Jersey. I've never been to the state, but she has, so i'll take her word for it. Basically it's this road that loops around the lake and it has a lot of tree's and mail boxes and stuff. It's kinda sweet. A little scary at night though.

After that we went to walmart to look around and then drove to the back of the thrift store because we saw an abandoned chair there. We posed with it and also at A&W. And then we called it a night.

It was a pretty fun day, we used to do this kind of stuff all the time. I missed it a lot. I kind of wish we had another day to do more stuff like that, but alas, it's technically sunday (Happy Easter!) and Betsy and I go back to school tomorrow...

Saturday, April 3, 2010

0_0

I just brushed my hair today for the first time in two days.

Some might think that's disgusting. I think that it is liberating.

I should become a hippie.

Why is this important to know, you might ask?

Well, it is important because I normally brush my hair every day. Multiple times a day. I would never think to NOT brush it. But perhaps since I think my hair is disgusting now that it's dark, I don't really want to think about it...hmm...that could be why. But either way man, it's kinda nice to not fuss with it every day. :)

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Beautiful Ending

In all my past blogs I wind up posting a lot of song lyrics that I find particularly awesome or pertain to myself in some way. This morning "Beautiful Ending" by Barlowgirl has been playing on my itunes. It's currently on repeat. If you just read the words it sounds a lot like how my prayers are right now. The part that gets to me the most is in the first verse, "And it scares me to think that I would choose my life over you, oh, my selfish heart, it divides me from you and it tears us apart."

Currently i'm struggling a lot with not doing devo's or spending any sort of time with God. And it's effected me a lot. It effects how I am treating people, my attitude, my school work and pretty much just everything. And the scary thing is, is that for a while I just thought it was okay. I still went to CRU and Bible Study and Vespers. I'm still a Christian. I'm just not really doing much to grow deeper in my faith. I had reached a comfortable level and was not willing to step out of that level that I was at. And it killed. Because all the while God was tugging at my heart saying that the race isn't finished yet, and regardless of all the hurts and worries I still had to keep pressing forward. But I didn't. I just thought I could take a break for a while. But that's not God's plan for my life.

Verse two has a really touching line, "Oh why do I let myself let go of hands that painted the stars and holds tears that fall? And the pride of my heart makes me forget that it's not me but you that makes the heart beat, i'm lost without you and dying from me."

That line really got a hold of me because I have become prideful, and it's wrong. I did let go of God's hand. But what's beautiful about that is that even though I let go, I still haven't left God's hand. I can only go so far down before being tugged back. And I think that sometimes God allows you to fall into the pit so you realize just how much you really do need Him in your life, and it builds character and when you've struggled and you've felt the hurt that it brings about, you're able to cope with it and possibly help someone else. So no matter what God will use it. God's love is amazing and it's beautiful and at the end of it all, I just wanna be in His arms.

Beautiful Ending- Barlowgirl

Oh, tragedy
Has taken so many
Love lost cause they all
Forgot who You were
And it scares me to think
That I would choose
My life over You
Oh, my selfish heart
Divides me from You
It tears us apart

So tell me
What is our ending?
Will it be beautiful
So beautiful?

Oh, why do I
Let myself let go
Of Hands that painted the stars
And hold tears that fall?
And the pride of my heart
Makes me forget
It's not me but You
Who makes the heart beat
I'm lost without You
And dying from me

So tell me
What is our ending?
Will it be beautiful
So beautiful?

Will my life
Find me by Your side?
Your love is beautiful
So beautiful

At the end of it all
I wanna be in Your arms
At the end of it all
I wanna be in Your arms
At the end of it all
I wanna be in Your arms
At the end of it all
I wanna be in Your arms

So tell me
What is our ending?
Will it be beautiful
So beautiful?
Will my life
Find me by Your side?
'Cause Your love is beautiful
So beautiful



P.S It is "Tell Her She's Beautiful Day," an event that I joined on facebook. Basically, today is a day where you just go tell women that they are beautiful because they never hear it enough and with the way the media is and everything else, women and girls honestly don't believe it. So to all the ladies who might be reading this, so far I just know of Alicia, you're beautiful! <3

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Awake and Alive

This song has been playing in my head and on my itunes all day. :P The lyrics pretty much speak to me right now.

Awake and Alive- Skillet

V1
I’m at war with the world and they
Try to pull me into the dark
I struggle to find my faith
As I’m slippin’ from your arms

It’s getting harder to stay awake
And my strength is fading fast
You breathe into me at last

Chorus
I’m awake I’m alive
Now I know what I believe inside
Now it’s my time
I’ll do what I want ’cause this is my life
here, right now
I’ll stand my ground and never back down
I know what I believe inside
I’m awake and I’m alive

V2
I’m at war with the world cause I
Ain’t never gonna sell my soul
I’ve already made up my mind
No matter what I can’t be bought or sold

When my faith is getting weak
And I feel like giving in
You breathe into me again

Bridge
Waking up waking up

In the dark
I can feel you in my sleep
In your arms I feel you breathe into me
Forever hold this heart that I will give to you
Forever I will live for you.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

World's Apart

Today during my Bible Study time with Shoemaker girls we listened to a song by Jars of Clay. It kinda hit me in a couple of spots. We had the lyrics in front of us and listened to the song.

Here are the lyrics...

"Worlds Apart"


I am the only one to blame for this
Somehow it all ends up the same
Soaring on the wings of selfish pride
I flew too high and like Icarus I collide
With a world I try so hard to leave behind
To rid myself of all but love
to give and die

To turn away and not become
Another nail to pierce the skin of one who loves
more deeply than the oceans,
more abundant than the tears
Of a world embracing every heartache

Can I be the one to sacrifice
Or grip the spear and watch the blood and water flow

To love you - take my world apart
To need you - I am on my knees
To love you - take my world apart
To need you - broken on my knees

All said and done I stand alone
Amongst remains of a life I should not own
It takes all I am to believe
In the mercy that covers me

Did you really have to die for me?
All I am for all you are
Because what I need and what I believe are worlds apart

I look beyond the empty cross
forgetting what my life has cost
and wipe away the crimson stains
and dull the nails that still remain
More and more I need you now,
I owe you more each passing hour
the battle between grace and pride
I gave up not so long ago
So steal my heart and take the pain
and wash the feet and cleanse my pride
take the selfish, take the weak,
and all the things I cannot hide
take the beauty, take my tears
the sin-soaked heart and make it yours
take my world all apart
take it now, take it now
and serve the ones that I despise
speak the words I can't deny
watch the world I used to love
fall to dust and thrown away
I look beyond the empty cross
forgetting what my life has cost
so wipe away the crimson stains
and dull the nails that still remain
so steal my heart and take the pain
take the selfish, take the weak
and all the things I cannot hide
take the beauty, take my tears
take my world apart, take my world apart
I pray, I pray, I pray
take my world apart



I really like the lyrics to that song, I like how it talks about being prideful and how we are forgetting the cost of sin. Anyway, it's just a great song!

In other news, I had a wonderful day! I went to my classes and then hung out with Molly and then Molly and Emily before Bible Study and we might all be living together next year in Stateview. And just time spent with Molly was amazing. God is good. :)

Monday, January 25, 2010

Still Awake..

Dear blogspot blog,

Is it weird to make bacon and toast at 5:30 am?

I'm going to do it anyway. K Bai.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Thoughts.

Oh man. I was SO CLOSE to posting on wednesday. If we're going to get technical, it's currently 12:01 thursday morning. But i'm going to pretend it's wednesday. :P

I really don't have a long post tonight. It was a pretty decent day. School was school and I had bible study today and that was really good. We basically just got all caught up with each other and talked about our Christmas breaks.

I also made a debut into a youtube video randomly.

I have learned today how easy it is to have idols. After a lot of thinking in Garvey, and I do mean a lot, I sat in Garvey from 3:15-5, I have realized just how many things I put above my relationship with God.

You know, some days, I don't even try. I feel really guilty saying that but it's completely true. Some days I completely shove God out of the picture and focus on my agenda and my plans. Dumb. That's SO DUMB!

I have realized this as I have spent every day wasting time. I haven't really done my homework. Or cleaned. Or prayed. Or read my bible. All of which are very important. Especially the last two. I've been on facebook a lot. I've spent a lot of times with friends which was really fun and I made a lot of memories, but really, sometimes I elevate friends above God. If I were to have a list of things/people that are most important on my list, right now I don't think God would be in the number one spot. And right now that breaks my heart and i'm sure it breaks God's heart too. He want's so much to be on that number one spot in my life and everyone's life.

Last semester, I felt like I wasn't really getting out there all that much, and I just wanted to take full advantage of opportunities that come my way to hang out with different people and to make sure i'm not just stuck in my all day every day. But I think I now know how dangerous this actually is to me. It's time to get back to the basics and work on my relationship with God and make sure he is number one in my life.

So, if you don't hear from me...i'm hoping that it is because i'm busy reading my Bible...

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Living life a little more recklessly.

So. After just downing a bowl of easy-mac, I thought to myself... "hmmm, i'm going to post a blog post every day..." So before that moods leaves me, I thought I should probably act on it.

I woke up this morning at the ripe ol' hour of 8:30. It was not very pleasant because I had become accustomed to sleeping in to almost noon all weekend long. I'm still not fully awake but hopefully my can of pepsi will fix that soon.

I had my educational psychology class this morning. It was a bore. It was pretty much the same lecture I have had in other Psych classes i've taken. We watched a lame movie. I had my eyes closed most of the time. It was nice. But anyway, this post so far bores me as i'm sure it bores you.

I have recently stumbled upon this website: http://www.kerismith.com/blog/ Keri Smith is the author of Wreck This Journal, a journal in which you of course um...wreck it. The warning in the book says:

Warning: During the process of this book you will get dirty. You may find yourself covered in paint, or any other number of foreign substances. You will get wet. You may be asked to do things you question. You may grieve for the perfect state that you found the book in. you may begin to see creative destruction everywhere. you may begin to live more recklessly.

Wreck this Journal is an amazing book. It was recommended to me by my roommate and best friend, Betsy. She of course had one, and was wrecking it all summer long while I was at camp. She told me stories of how it was dragged behind her car, thrown into corn fields, dropped from high ladders, thrown against walls and people, used for hot potato, and all sorts of things. And I, I really love books. It makes me sad to see covers being torn away from books. I love it when they are nice and clean. Defacing the cover of my journal was a very hard thing for me to do. But it is kind of worth it. I have begun to live a little more recklessly. Thank you, Keri Smith.

And as for everyone else, I highly suggest you purchase your own copy of Wreck this Journal. It's currently $9.32 on amazon.

Monday, January 18, 2010

New Year, New Blog.

Well, today is the 18th of January. I'm a little slow but I decided to start this year off with a new blog.

Here's just a little information about my past blogs. They usually die. Very very shortly after I create them. They serve as last-minute journal entries as if I were writing in a diary. Although, I was a co-author of this one blog called "Sensational-Sensational" (My friends and I wrote about things we thought were sensational..) but after a few months we ran out of idea's I guess and the blog is now officially dead. Seriously, you can't even see it anymore. :(

My goal for this blog is to not let it die. Or at least let it survive longer than 3 months. I feel like my life could be interesting enough now to keep this sucker going. So, I guess we'll see.

I guess I'll start this blog off with a brief introduction. My name is Mindy. I'm a college student, i'm studying to become an elementary school teacher. I'm in my twenties. I come from a very small town in Minnesota. I'm a Christian. I love to read and listen to music and hang out with friends. I have a lot of fun and crazy friends and an amazing boyfriend. You will rarely ever see me without my cell phone in hand...or pocket. We're pretty much attached. Um...i'm dreading going to class tomorrow...

That's about it I guess. That sums me up in a paragraph as well as a paragraph can some someone up I guess.

My life right now consists of going to school, doing homework and hanging out with friends. I had an amazing weekend though! I spent a lot of time with some gal-pals of mine and we played games, laughed a lot, dyed hair and went out on the town. I spent pretty much every day with my boyfriend and we went out as well, and that is always fun. :) My weekend goals were to clean my dorm room and do my homework but neither of them were accomplished, even though today is a holiday so there was no classes. That was kinda a dumb move...and then I made a new blog. Just goes to show you the extent of my procrastination.

...Now i'm feeling guilty, so I should probably read something for my class tomorrow...

Fair Well!